Protection
by rillab
Summary: The family is forced into the Witness Protection Program. "So when you were separated from your entire family, you still sought out the one member you couldn't stand? How did you manage to not kill each other without outside intervention?" "We improvised"
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. Fact.**

Chapter 1

Casey was sat at the kitchen table, her studies aided by the feeling of satisfaction gained by the organised fashion in which her books and stationary were laid out around her. Such order could only exist without the presence of family members, presently an additional cause for satisfaction. It wasn't long before the peace was disturbed, as a parade comprising of the other family members rushed through the door, tripping over shoes, bags and each other in their eagerness to find shelter from the Canadian winter.

"That was amazing. Did you guys see all those college scouts desperate to give me scholarships?" boasted Derek, his claim meeting an enthusiastic chorus of agreement.

"You'll need to get through your exams in order for it to be worth anything," countered Casey, which was met by a snort of derision from Derek.

"You're studying already? But we're only just learning the stuff. How can you revise it? Only a loser like you could be such a keener," yelled Derek, from behind the door of the fridge that he was currently raiding.

Derek sat a plate of leftovers on top of one of Casey's work sheets. She knocked it off the table, and rubbed at the mark it had left on her algebra. Derek's full mouth of food stopped him from complaining as he dropped to the floor, and began to eat the food that had not fallen off the plate.

"I think you might be the most disgusting person I have ever met," spat Casey, not lifting her eyes to see what he was doing.

"That's not very nice. Might be? Why don't you wait until you know for sure, and then tell me? No good saying something mean until you're sure it's true," baited Derek.

This sent Marti, already hyper from the game, into a fit of giggles. Derek instructed Edwin to clean up the mess, and then joined Marti in the sitting room, where he sat her on his knee to watch television. He quietly stroked Marti's back until she fell asleep.

Later that night, once all of their respective children had followed Marti's example, George and Nora sat in bed. Nora was reading a novel, for the recently reformed neighbourhood reading circle, and George was studying case papers, for a wilful negligence and wrongful dismissal case a local man was bringing against a previous employer. He bit his lip and muttered to himself, obviously deep in thought.

"Is everything ok?" asked Nora, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"Some of the stuff I've been uncovering for this case doesn't sit right. I'm sure it'll turn out to be nothing though," said George, putting his papers on the bedside table. Nora, knowing this was as much information as he was likely to divulge, changed the subject.

"I've been thinking, Georgie, it feels like the end of an era," pondered Nora, talking to herself as much as her husband. "Our oldest children will be flying the nest soon. It just feels like one of those moments when things will never be the same again. Do you know what I mean?"

"Yep. It'll be quieter," George only half joked, switching off the bedside light.

* * *

Time seemed to alter as final exams crept up on Derek, whilst allowing adequate time for Casey to work herself into a fury. Derek found himself driving to the final exam of their school days, with Casey sat in the passenger seat, studying a textbook, and muttering French vocabulary to herself, unknowingly causing great irritation to Derek.

"Why isn't Max giving you a lift", enquired Derek casually, mainly with the intention of stopping her moving onto the irregular past tense.

"We broke up…" murmured Casey, seemingly nonchalant. Derek looked over at Casey to make sure he wasn't hearing things "…three weeks ago," taking his eyes off the road for a second, Derek failed to notice the car swerving into the opposite lane. "I had to prioritise my studies," continued Casey, as a blast from the horn of an annoyed motorist brought Derek's attention back to the road. "I didn't want to be distracted by Max drama," finished Casey. Derek overcompensated trying to get back into the right lane, and drove head on into a tree. The jolt finally brought Casey's nose out of her book. Whilst Derek was still catching his breath, apparently Casey had already caught hers.

"Derek! What on earth?"

"Your lack of drama was so un-Casey-like, I had to do something to make up for it," said Derek, swiftly getting out of the car to examine the damage, and avoid the ear bashing Casey seemed intent on.

"I guess the Prince has abdicated."

* * *

Nora pulled up to the curb, and George got into the car. He had barely touched the seat when Nora spoke up, "Don't panic but… Derek and Casey had a little bump….in the Prince…"

"What does that mean? They're fine though?" rushed George and Nora nodded. "Is the car…" realising that she had already assuaged his concern for his first born and step-daughter, Nora interrupted his tirade to bring the focus back to their children. The more he was aware of their close scrape, the less likely it was that he would be upset about the scrapes to the Prince. It was a fine balance, she didn't want to make too much of what had happened either.

"They drove into a tree. The kids are fine, the car is at the garage, and the tree will make a full recovery. They dealt with it perfectly, they called the car rescue place, then called me, and I got them to their exam just on time. I got a text from Casey half an hour ago. Apparently she freaked in the exam…" Nora gave a half smile, seeing that George had calmed down.

"Just like in all of the others," finished George.

"Just like in all of the others. She said she's glad it's over though. I figure if she's composed enough to rationalise then it didn't go too badly," conceded Nora, letting the car fall into silence.

"My client died," said George suddenly, his tone suggesting that was only the start of the problem.

"Oh," breathed Nora, letting him know that he had her full attention.

"He supposedly fell out of a fifth storey window. The police have branded it suspicious and I agree. Things just didn't add up with his employer… or maybe I just didn't like the answers. I should have done something…" mulled George, and continued before Nora could say anything to try to ease his guilt. "That guy had a wife and children. I know I have to go forward with what I've seen. I know what I have to do, I just don't want to do it,"

"Mm-hm," Nora tried to process the information. It was evident that it had been weighing heavily on George's mind.

"I thought you ought to know… the fallout might impact on all of us" admitted George, finally finding the courage to look at Nora for her reaction.

"I knew you had principles when I married you. More than that, it was partly why I married you, and it's not going to be a reason for me to leave," Nora assured him and pulled into the drive.

**Authors note: I don't think this is a premise I've ever seen in relation to Life with Derek before but I've tried to keep the story fairly contained because this is my first ever fanfic. If anyone fancies taking the concept in a different direction in their own fanfic, feel free. Also if anyone is up for betaing please let me know. Thanks.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it.**

Chapter 2

The next morning, George pulled his boss aside, and ushered him into an empty conference room.

"I'm sorry I didn't come to you with this sooner, Martin, but I wasn't sure it amounted to anything," explained George, as he opened the file and arranged the sheets over the table, "It's in reference to the Perry case."

"The client passed away last week, I believe," said the senior partner, and George nodded, "Is this concerning the defendant?"

"Yes," acknowledged George, the whole affair seemed so unlikely that he was somewhat relieved he was being taken seriously, and that his boss was following this turn of events, even if he not anticipated them. "I've uncovered some documents that make rather uncomfortable reading, and, prior to his death, Mr Perry had conceded his involvement in a number of related events. I perhaps didn't give them the weight they deserved, but his murder certainly grants them a gravity we can't ignore," finished George, with a now familiar resignation.

"His murder?"

"The police seemed to think so, when they contacted me last week. I wanted to re-examine and prepare the files before I brought them forward, would you mind going through them with me now?" asked George.

"Absolutely. I'll cancel my next appointment and be right back. I'm sorry this has happened, George, if not entirely surprised," admitted Martin.

George was torn between relief and disappointment when, after carefully pouring over the case, his boss reached the same conclusions he had. He had been right, any second-guessing had been wishful thinking, and there was nothing to be done but take his findings to the police, and await the repercussions.

Later that afternoon, George contacted the police and shared with them what he had uncovered, they confirmed that his findings and testimony constituted motive. In the following days, they uncovered testimonies and forensic evidence, and as the prosecution case gathered momentum it seemed inevitable that he would be called as a key witness.

* * *

A few weeks later, the family were sprawled around the sitting room watching a DVD that Marti had chosen, when someone posted something through the letterbox. Grateful for the interruption Edwin got up and retrieved the letter. "Someone has an admirer," he joked and handed it to George.

George raised an eyebrow at the 'G Venturi' scratched onto the front, and opened the envelope. He took on a stony appearance that Derek had never seen before, and said nothing as he rose to the phone to call the police. He kept his voice low and steady, so not to panic his family, and that conscious effort briefly distracted him from the implications of the letter. He was snapped out of his denial when the policeman on the other end told him to gather family together, and await the arrival of the Mounties.

George and Nora sat everyone down around the kitchen table, and revealed as much as they needed to know. They refused to go into specifics regarding the substance of the threat, but Derek had seen the blood drain from his father's face when they received it, and was content to let it remain unclear in his mind lest it, god forbid, involve Marti. As far as the children were ever aware the option of his dad pulling out of the trial was never raised.

Two Mounties arrived within half an hour looking suitably grim, and George accompanied them into the kitchen where they examined the letter. By the time they emerged George had taken on an expression of reluctant acceptance.

"These people mean business," said the constable bluntly. "We have evaluated the risk of your situation, and are formally offering your family a place in the Witness Protection Program. You can refuse to enter the program, but we don't recommend it," His tone brokered no room for compromise; it was obvious that he had experience convincing people to enter the program. There was a silence unfamiliar to the household, as everyone tried to get their heads around what was happening.

"What would that entail?" asked Nora, thinking on her feet like only a mother could.

"We would provide you with new identities, accommodation, jobs and resources to begin a new life elsewhere in Canada. In order to maintain the anonymity, and thus security, of your family under the program you would not be allowed to contact anyone that you currently know, family or friends. George will be under our protection when he is called upon to provide testimony, as and when the case is taken to court. We will re-evaluate the situation once the case is over…" explained the Mountie.

No one knew what to say. It was as though a bomb had been dropped into the middle of their lives, and anything they could think to say sounded ridiculously insignificant.

"What about university? Derek and I have acceptance letters waiting to be answered," asked Casey, finally finding her voice.

"We can't guarantee where you'll be relocated to, so if you want to stay as one unit you would not get any choice as to which school you attend, and as part of a larger group the chances of having to relocate would mean distance learning might be the best option in that scenario," it seemed there was a response for every set of circumstances, and Casey's question no longer seemed so out of left field.

"In that scenario? Are there others?" Casey quizzed the Mountie.

"We could relocate you separately, your university would have to be chosen in consultation with us, to make sure that it is suitable, and that we have local support to put the necessary measures in place. You wouldn't be allowed any direct contact with the rest of your family whilst in the program for the foreseeable future," the constable added the second sentence like a disclaimer, Casey choked but Nora's face turned resolute.

"I don't want you and Derek to have to put your lives on hold; I don't want you to resent us down the line for holding you back. You've worked so hard and have so much potential. Besides, you would be leaving home and going to university at any rate, we'll just have less contact. I know it's not ideal but it won't be forever," reasoned Nora.

"Actually ma'am, we can't make any promises as to when or if we'll be able to review the situation."

"But it won't be forever," ventured Nora. She felt as though she was grasping at straws.

"I don't imagine so but as I said…"

"Then that's what I want to do," decided Derek breaking his silence for the first time in the conversation, and the room turned to face him, surprised at the sudden and definite interjection. Marti's bottom lip began to tremble. "I don't want you cramping my style at college too," joked Derek though nobody laughed. Casey made a strange strangled sound somewhere between a snort and a sob. Everyone turned to Casey expecting an answer, which wasn't forthcoming. The sergeant cleared his throat.

"I don't know what I want to do," said Casey eventually, staring at the tabletop, as though there was some puzzle there that contained an answer to her dilemma. She had spent so much time planning her entire life, and here at the precipice a spanner had been thrown in the works that she had no idea how to deal with.

"You have a few days to decide. We're going to take you to a safe house now, until the plans are put in place for your relocation," explained the constable.

"Now?" asked Nora, suddenly switching from concerned mode to flustered mode, as the prospect of uprooting her family became a reality.

"Yes. If you could pack your bags we should leave within the hour," said the Mountie, with an air of finality that caused everyone to rise from the table and head to their respective rooms to begin the process of packing up their lives.

It was dark by the time they arrived at the safe house, probably a good thing considering the neighbourhood and the shabby exterior of the building, which hinted at some less than savoury neighbours. Not that it mattered anyway, considering they didn't leave the tiny flat for the next few days, confined to the three bedrooms and kitchen/sitting-room. Nora and George took Marti with them, whilst Derek and Edwin shared and Casey and Lizzie took the third room. They watched public television and played games with a depleted deck of cards. As everyone had anticipated, Casey decided she did want to go to university, and subsequently spent hours staring at her acceptance letters, which she had been asked to rank in order of preference, and was not allowed to discuss with the rest of her family.

They had developed a degree of cabin fever trapped in safe house, but when the time finally came for them to leave nobody wanted to. The Mounties had asked them to have their bags packed ready to leave at any time, and when they showed up to take Derek first there was scarcely five minutes warning. Of course, five minutes was more than adequate for Marti and Nora to build up floods of tears. Casey may have been tempted too, had she not discovered Derek's detailed and thorough amendments to her yearbook that morning: "_You really took your toll. _I'll always remember you. Love, Noel", "I'll miss you_, Klutzilla_", "You'll always have a place in my heart_, Space Case_. _From, Football Face_", and his personal favourite, "_Don__'__t ever contact me again, Paul_"

"I'm so sorry you've been dragged into all of this, son. This isn't how I'd imagined sending you off to university…" lamented George.

"I hadn't imagined a university accepting him," Casey's dig was under her breath, and if anyone caught it they didn't say anything. Derek was grateful though, the familiar bickering lightened the mood; he was sure that Casey was borderline maudlin and if sniping kept her on the non-hysterical side of the line then so be it. All the same, he pretended not to have heard her, it wasn't the time for a full-blown fight (they'd had enough in the past few days to tide them over for quite some time).

"I'm sure it's far less embarrassing than anything you had planned," Derek's wit was being employed at full kilter, trying to keep the sentimentality at bay.

"We could have had another dancing party," offered Edwin lamely, he had cottoned on to Derek's diversionary tactics, but didn't have to spirit to execute the plan fully.

"We've had all that practice, lesson number one being that you can't host a party from the games closet," Lizzie tried her best to help Derek's plan along.

"How am I going to be Smarti without Smerek?" wailed Marti, and then there was no stopping them. The floodgates had officially opened. Had anyone been able to see through the tears they would have seen that Derek's half-hearted resistance to the family hug was futile.

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to hurry you," interrupted a Mountie awkwardly.

"We're so proud of you, Derek," said George giving Derek a final squeeze.

"You really are a son to me. Know that we all love you very much," Nora was holding back the tears as she held her arms out to her stepson.

"You're going to have to learn to make your own cereal," Edwin was still holding up for the team as Derek patted his back.

"I'll miss you Derek," Lizzie's goodbye was no-nonsense as usual as she hugged Derek.

Marti couldn't find a gap long enough between sobs to get a word out, but Derek picked her up and kissed her forehead. "Don't worry Smarti, I'll always be your Smerek... I promise," he whispered in her ear, quietening her sobs. He placed her back on the ground, and with a flick of his hand brushed off any contact Casey might have been tempted to initiate.

"Later, Space Case," he said as he turned and left the flat.

**Acknowledgement: Many thanks to Moonlit-Jeannie for the beta and the encouragement.**

**Authors note: There are elements of this story where I have used a degree of artistic licence, either because I needed to for the sake of the story, or because they****'****re near impossible to research. I won****'****t say where because then they****'****ll annoy everyone, not just the people who would have noticed them anyway, but I apologise if that means you.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it.**

Chapter 3

A few days later, Casey was also relocated separately, under the alias of Caitlin McConnell. This allowed her to enrol as an undergraduate at the University of Toronto, as had been her plan prior to the events of the past week. It was within a few hours distance of London, so she chopped her hair into a bob, and added honey blonde highlights which, in addition to being a physical change, she hoped would boost her confidence in her lying abilities, should anyone recognise her. She arrived on campus a month or so before the majority of the student body, and being Casey, promptly signed up to a vast array of clubs and societies, silently hoping they would help her ward off the homesickness she was anticipating.

She couldn't fathom why the Witness Protection Program had put her in such a dingy bed-sit, it was only marginally more sanitary than their safe house; presumably their budget hadn't reached to places with doorbells. So when the cheerleading squad approached her with the opportunity of joining them in shared halls, she signed up. She had not been sure how to refuse them, not when they were aware of her current, less than desirable, living situation, and besides, she fancied the idea of coming home to a roommate. Just not the particular roommate she was allocated; Louise had altogether different expectations, as she seemed to be under the impression that rooming with a cheerleader would mean someone willing to leave when she came home… with company, as was regularly the case. The upside to the arrangement was that Louise had such a contrasting temperament there was no danger of the pair spilling intimate secrets, at least not verbally. She sorely missed being able to tell Emily everything or, as she thought in darker moments, tell anybody anything.

The loneliness did arrive, alleviated slightly by the familiarity and distraction that cheerleading and dance offered, and she found herself immediately at the centre of a community of people. Though she was glad she was not alone enough to wallow, it was exhausting trying to get know people whilst being conscious she could not venture beyond her cover story.

Annoying roommates aside, Casey eventually fell into a pattern that suited her as well as could be expected, under the circumstances. One evening in March, found her at her desk planning a paper for her English Literature class, when Louise dragged a boy in, who currently looked incapable of walking. Apparently he still had enough control of his bodily functions to check Casey out, and she recognised him from the football team.

"I see the cheerleading squad is one of the perks of being on the football team?" The dig was aimed at Louise, but it was Toby who answered.

"Hey Caitlin," replied Toby, miraculously processing her comment quickly enough to take it the wrong way, "Aren't you on the cheerleading squad too? Does that mean I get two perks?"

"Hey Caitlin, Toby and I are looking to get better acquainted, so you might want to leave," Louise interrupted the pleasantries, seemingly worried that Casey would be inclined to take Toby up on his offer.

"As if," cried Casey, at the thought of going near the leering quarterback.

"Caitlin, Toby and I are looking to get better acquainted, so I want you to leave. Now," repeated Louise, reinforcing her point by bringing a leg up over Toby.

"By better acquainted, you mean that you're trying to catch a memento of your first year?" said Casey, as she resigned herself to leaving, and gathered up her laptop. In Louise, Casey had found an outlet for her sniping skills, which were finely tuned after years of fighting with Derek.

"If you don't pipe down, we'll use your bed after you leave, and you can risk sharing in the freshman experience too," threatened Louise, and Casey grabbed her keys, as she headed for the door.

"Hey! I don't have…" Toby's cry rang out, as he belatedly clued into the insinuation behind their jibes, and then the door slammed behind Casey, muffling the rest of his indignation.

* * *

It had become a ritual of Casey's to escape to the 24-hour coffee shop around the corner from her halls, so much so that she had struck up a flirtation with the man who worked the late shift, an engineering student called Michael. As she collapsed with a groan into one of the large leather chairs, he made his way over to with a cup of green tea in hand.

"Louise forced you into exodus again?" he guessed, not so much a question as a statement of fact.

He regularly offered a sympathetic ear to Casey's Louise-shaped rants, and they had been on a couple of dates which, although nothing spectacular, had confirmed her impression of him as a hard-working farm-reared boy from Nova-Scotia. He was a comfortable choice; their relationship was simple and relatively plain-sailing (at least on the Casey-scale-of-drama). An outside observer might have remarked upon his resemblance to Max, not that Casey would have admitted it, but it was part of his appeal. The similarity extended to his conversational skills, which made retaining the necessary degree of privacy easier.

Casey stayed at the café until the early morning, writing a paper, whilst occasionally taking breaks for banter and complimentary green teas, a benefit of dating Michael. She finally ventured home as the sun came up and, as expected, Toby was nowhere to be seen. She changed into her pyjamas and crawled into bed, but the caffeine currently doing laps in her system prevented her from sleeping, and it wasn't until 8.30am that she finally fell asleep. She slept fitfully, and was so exhausted that when her alarm went off, she hit the off button, instead of snooze.

She awoke groggily, and when she glanced over to see Louise that was gone she knew she had slept in. One look at her alarm clock confirmed the extent of the damage was worse than she feared, and she threw off her duvet with a groan. Bemoaning her lack of time to shower, she pulled on her uniform, tied back her hair, hurriedly applied her mascara, and rushed to a pre-game cheerleading display for the Varsity Blues ice hockey team at the Varsity Arena.

She scarcely had time to collect her thoughts, and work up a suitably peppy energy before she found herself hoisted onto the second tier of a pyramid. It was then that she caught sight of a mop of brown hair, attached to someone that brought her two worlds crashing together. Derek. Her stomach lurched, tears caught in her throat, her knees buckled, and the pyramid tumbled to the ground.

**Acknowledgement: Thanks again to Moonlit-Jeannie for the beta and for her helpful suggestions**

**Authors Note: Thank you for all your feedback; it****'****s very encouraging for first-timer like myself, however, I would like to point out that I****'****m British, so that might account for some of the perceived spelling mistakes in this story. I apologise if anyone finds that off putting. I****'****ve been informed that Canadian English is somewhere between British English and American English, so I****'****m going to be right some of the time. I did go back and change ****"****kerb****"**** to ****"****curb****"****, though where I****'****m from we only have cobblestones. I jest but slightly.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: Due to technical issues (a.k.a no internet connection in my new flat), I'm posting this un-beta'd.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

Chapter 4

Casey scrambled to help the other cheerleaders up. As they moved back into formation, her mind was reeling so fast that she was oblivious to the glares of Louise and her friends. The glimpse had been so fleeting that she thought she might have imagined it, but as she looked out onto the ice she knew she hadn't; despite his full padding, her eyes picked him out instantly. Again her reaction to him caused her to physically jolt. She figured that it was shock; she hadn't expected to see him, she was reminded her how much she missed everyone, and panic, because she had to work out a course of action.

Derek had been secretly thrilled to be able to take up the hockey scholarship that he had won at the University of Alberta, as the newly christened Daniel Valenti. He tried out successfully for the team, and although as a new player he hadn't made the starting team during the first semester, he slotted into the team's social calendar immediately, and was never short of friends or female attention.

He had toyed with dating one girl for a few weeks, but she after she mentioned his sleep-talking, and then began to distance herself from him, he made a concerted effort to maintain a policy of strict detachment. Being single was hardly a sacrifice; it was his default state, and as a student he had plenty to keep him distracted, with a whole campus of potential dates, not even counting all the cheerleaders he met whilst touring the country, playing in the Interuniversity cup. Casey wasn't quite what he had in mind there, he thought wryly, as he watched her pick herself up from a pile on the floor.

Casey couldn't believe that she would have been lucky enough for him to have missed seeing her, she had fallen over after all. When she approached him after the game, she knew instantly that she was right, because he wasn't remotely fazed.

"Hi, I'm Daniel," stated Derek, emphasising his new name, and cutting off Casey before she had a chance to blow their cover.

"Hi, I'm Louise," purred Casey's roommate, believing she had an opportunity to snag a guy Casey was interested in. "You don't need to know who that klutz is," Louise pointed at Casey, and Derek smirked.

At the after game party, Derek avoided Casey, leaving rooms as she entered them, he didn't think to be subtle; it wasn't in his nature, and no one had cause to notice. He drank a lot, but she didn't know whether that was because he was as shaken up as her, or whether he had been embracing the college lifestyle during the months they had been apart. In truth, it was a combination of both, but Derek was not planning on sharing that information, and Casey was not in a position to criticise, as no one was aware that the two knew each other. Casey recognised this, and realising she wouldn't get a chance to talk to Derek, she left early.

Later that evening, Casey sat on her bed looking at pictures of her family, in a locked folder on her laptop. The light from the screen bathed the room in a bluish glow, which was shattered by light flooding in from the hallway as the door opened. She quickly closed the window, and maximised the solitaire game at the bottom of the screen, as Louise pulled her latest conquest into the room.

"You met my roommate, Caitlin. She's a bit of a prude, but her boyfriend, Michael, lives nearby so she can always _leave,_" spat Louise, stressing the last word, as though she could have been in danger of subtlety.

"She's your roommate?" asked Derek, his eyes widening in surprise. Louise nodded, as far as she knew the pair had only met once fleetingly a few hours previously, so neither was in the position to kick up a fuss. Louise took the pause as a cue to jump Derek, and she pushed him onto the bed, promptly straddling him.

Casey wondered when Derek had dropped his no-PDA rule; it could have been due in part to the alcohol in his system, the dim room, that as pseudo-family she didn't qualify for the public clause, or maybe Derek knew how much it would annoy her and was relishing the opportunity. She rolled her eyes, and began to consider her options, her hand was somewhat forced, as Louise began to grind against Derek and slowly moved down his body. Did Derek have no decency? She had discovered on numerous occasions that Louise did not, so it was up to Derek to stop before Casey was scarred for life. When she heard unbuckling and unzipping sounds coming from the neighbouring bed, Casey hurriedly began to stuff things in her bag. She briefly wondered how Derek always managed to hone in on girls with the sexual nuance of sledgehammers, though in truth she admitted they were obviously drawn to him.

Casey, who was in the process of zipping up her boots, realised the sounds and movements from the other bed had ceased, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

"What's wrong?" whined Louise, obviously not sharing Casey's perspective.

"I can't… not with her here," explained Derek, motioning towards Casey. Derek too had a modesty threshold, albeit to a different degree than Casey.

"I didn't have you down as a killjoy," complained Louise, obviously offended as she untangled herself from Derek, and turned to Casey, "I'm going to the toilet. When I get back I want you gone, Caitlin," growled Louise, and swept out of the room.

"Nice catch, Derek, I see you're still picking the winners," muttered Casey, switching on the light as she finished packing her bag, and moved over to sit on the bed beside him.

"It looked to me like I was on a winning streak. Don't you want to leave so I can score again?" baited Derek, intent on avoiding the conversation that he knew Casey was attempting to engage him in.

"I miss you," she offered quietly, and he sniggered in response. "I miss everyone," qualified Casey, and the room fell into silence.

"I do too," admitted Derek quietly. His face showed no expression, and Casey almost wondered if she had heard him, until she noticed his jaw was clenched with the effort of restraining emotions he had kept well buried. Casey leant over to pull Derek into a sideways hug, but he flinched at her touch, and jerked away.

"You still won't hug me?" Casey half asked and half stated, sounding wounded.

"Nope. What did you think had changed that I would?" asked Derek, obviously rhetorically, but Casey replied anyway.

"I feel like you're the closest I've been to family in over ten months."

"You feel less like family than ever," replied Derek unthinkingly. It was Casey's turn to recoil, as though he had struck her, and tears began to form in her eyes. He panicked, as he realised how badly she had interpreted his statement. "… I guess... I mean... I've never hugged you because you never felt like family… Or a friend," he continued, tripping over his words, as he covered unfamiliar territory in his hurry to placate her. "It wasn't like I didn't want to exactly…" appeased Derek. He was cut off, before he could ramble further, when Louise entered the room.

"Why are you still here?" asked Louise, her voice taking on a warning tone.

Casey got up to leave, and turned to Derek as though to say something, but she couldn't find the words to begin, and there was nothing for her to do but turn around and leave. She had forgotten how that happened around him. Derek knew she had wanted to find out what he had meant by his last statement, and a large part of him was relieved that Louise had interrupted them, because he wasn't sure what exactly he had meant.

**Authors Note: I'm just going to cover Derek and Casey's lives at the moment, so the audience will be as in the dark as they are. I do know what George, Nora, Edwin, Lizzie and Marti are up to, I'm just not writing about it currently, as Derek and Casey are proving to be enough of a handful. I may eventually do parallel piece around the others, depending on how this one is received. Speaking of which, thank you for all of your reviews.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Authors Note: This chapter is also unbeta'd, due to persisting technical problems.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

Chapter 5

Despite having achieved his desired level of intoxication at the party, Derek had sobered up whilst talking to Casey, and felt the urge to drink himself into a numb stupor after she left the room, which had been achieved by way of a bottle of vodka that Louise kept in her bedside table. Derek blamed this for Louise having obtained his phone number, his best guess was that he had hoped to annoy Casey, but he couldn't remember. In the cold light of day he realised that it was stupid, really stupid; he was possibly endangering Casey by having calls to her room on his phone record, and although he had made clear he wasn't interested, Louise was persistent, not to mention very irritating, during the following months. There was also a nagging voice in the back of his head that proclaimed that it was unfair Louise could call him, and endanger them without realizing, whilst he couldn't call Casey, not that he would have anyway.

Casey quickly realised Derek was frustrated having to repeatedly knock Louise back, but she saw it as his karma, and a matter of private amusement. She had continued to share with Louise; the cheerleaders had refused to re-shuffle the rooms, and though it was never explicitly said, neither had friends willing to share with them. Over the summer she suffered from a fresh wave of homesickness, reading and re-reading letters from Lizzie and Nora, overanalysing the tone of every word, until they fell apart between her fingers. She and Michael had reached a brick wall, as she became increasingly frustrated with constantly being on guard against mentioning the things she really cared about, as her previous life was off limits. Michael, for his part, eventually recognised that there were barriers between them, and suggested they take a break. She wondered how he had managed to remain oblivious for so long.

In her monthly briefing from the Mounties, Casey mentioned that Derek had visited Toronto, though she omitted the finer points of their interaction. She could tell from the Mountie's tone that he was not pleased that they had been in contact, and she could almost hear the cogs in his head turning as he considered how to apply protocol to the situation. He told her to meet him in a coffeehouse off-campus the following November, when Derek was next due to play again.

* * *

When Casey reached the café, Derek and the Mountie were already there, she assumed they had purposefully staggered their arrivals, because she was still as punctual as ever. She could tell from the atmosphere that Derek wasn't pleased, and she wondered why as she greeted them.

"Why did you tell him that we'd seen each other?" asked Derek, immediately revealing why he was annoyed; he did not appreciate missing quality sporting/cheerleader-chasing time.

"I assumed you'd have told mentioned it too. We've had to go without seeing our family for a year. There's no use taking chances with something like this. We only said hi in passing after all," Casey silently told Derek how much she had revealed. She could see him reach the understanding, as the Mountie explained why it was crucial they not be seen together.

"It's very important you don't take any unnecessary risks. We've already had to relocate the rest of your family again, following an incident, so there is cause for concern," warned the constable.

"What do you mean by that?!" shrieked a panicked Casey.

"I can't go into any details. I only told you with the hope you'd appreciate the severity of the situation. Nothing serious came of the incident, you would be informed had that been the case, but we have stepped up security. You'll have been aware that there have been no letters for the past few months, and that's why. I need to be able to trust both of you not to investigate any further," drilled the constable.

"Of course," nodded Casey. When Derek failed to respond, the Mountie looked to him expectantly, and Derek shrugged, as if to indicate his agreement.

"Speaking of which, you really shouldn't be playing any sports where there are spectators," continued the Mountie.

"What?!" exclaimed Derek, evidently he had found that to be the most objectionable part of the conversation, thought Casey dryly.

"You gain attention playing hockey. If there was national press at a game it would be necessary for you to withdraw immediately," the constable's tone brokered no room for compromise.

"But I'm barely recognisable in all my padding. Casey meanwhile is a cheerleader, in case you hadn't noticed - her uniform exposes all sorts of recognisable bits," grumbled an indignant Derek, which caused Casey to shove the table in his direction.

"Derek!"

"I trust you're clear on the points we covered. Please leave here separately, and try not have any further contact," said the Mountie as he stood up to leave, adding under his breath, so that neither Casey nor Derek heard him, "though why you'd even want to is beyond me…"

"You're such a pig. I see some things never change," complained Casey, once they were alone again.

"You mean like you ratting me out to the Mounties. What did you think that was going to do? Were you aiming to be their favourite? You're the same keener you always were," sniped Derek, and immediately their fight was in full flow.

"You're just lucky I didn't tell him about you giving Louise your room number," said Casey disdainfully, "How's that going by the way?"

"She's irritating and pushy. No wonder you room together, like two peas in a pod," Derek didn't believe a word that was coming out of his mouth, but he knew it was hitting its intended mark, as Casey became increasingly wound up.

"She's with a different guy every night, she thinks of no one but herself, and she has a drink problem. How could I not have expected you to hit it off?" returned Casey maliciously. Apparently she too could still hit below the belt, and Derek rose out of his seat. All memory of the Mountie's instructions were forgotten in the heat of the moment, and Casey followed him as he left the coffee shop.

"Well at least I have a sex life, which is more than can be said for a preppy, prissy princess like you," spat Derek. He knew without looking that Casey was behind him, and whirled around to face her.

"You obviously don't know the first thing about me," claimed Casey, angry at his presumptions.

"Sure I do. You dated Sam, remember, then moved onto the obviously closeted Max, and now you're dating Michael, who I'm sure is another fine, wimpy specimen," Derek advanced on Casey.

"I'm a sexual person," Casey's comeback lacked bite, as she registered that Derek had remembered Michael's name from one brief mention. Derek sensed that he had thrown her off her game, and backed her into a wall until they were almost nose-to-nose.

"I'm sure you could be. If you didn't constantly suppress it, by refusing to date anyone who'd try to have their wicked way with you," Derek's comment hit a nerve, but she had no time to think about what that meant, before a voice pulled them out of the bubble of confrontation they were in.

"What have we here?" asked Louise, Casey's roommate, causing the pair to jump apart, as though they had touched hot coals. "Didn't you just get dumped last week? And already you're moving onto my conquests?" Casey noted Derek's grimace at earning that title, but it seemed that Louise did not. "Long time no see, Danny. What are you up to now?" she hinted, her tone changing as she switched to seductive mode. Casey took the opportunity to make as graceful an exit as was possible.

**Authors Note: I'm aware that the characters in Casey's life might seem like slightly 2-dimensional villains, but the idea is that the WPP impedes her from establishing deeper relationships, and shallow, mean people are more engaging to write than shallow, nice people. That's also why I'm focussing heavily on Derek and Casey's interaction, because that's when things are in sharper focus for the characters, as it were, and, conveniently enough, it's also the part I find most interesting (I assume most readers do too). I hope you all enjoyed the fight in this chapter, I was more worried about writing it than I was about writing the next chapter, which contains actual, proper Dasey...**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don****'****t own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

Chapter 6

When Casey arrived at the after game party, she immediately deduced that Derek had managed to extract himself from Louise's claws at some point during the intervening hours; Louise was now attached to the hip of a very receptive Michael. Casey guessed that the sweet nothings Louise was currently whispering in his ear included the position that Casey and Derek had, seemingly, been caught in earlier. This was confirmed when Michael caught sight of her, scowled, and swooped down to kiss the back of Louise's neck. Casey headed straight for the bar.

Contrary to Casey's assertion, the Mountie's revelation that something had happened to their family, had put Derek in a tailspin. By the time he turned up at the party, he had resolved to track down Casey, and discuss the nature of the 'incident'. He could read her tells, when she was disguising a reaction , and he was certain that she didn't notice him enter. She failed to register his presence, even when his team-mates chanted his name, celebrating his winning goal. Her eyes remained fixed at the bottom of her glass. Derek was stunned when he realised Casey was drinking; during all the time he had known her, he had never known her to drink alcohol. It explained why she was so unobservant though, and unease filled him at the prospect of approaching a drunk Casey.

Instead, he watched, with growing disquiet, as he counted her sixth return visit to refill her glass. Eventually, after an inner pep talk (_he was the fearless Derek Venturi_), he stood behind her at the bar, once again filled with trepidation (_tap on her shoulder, it__'__s just Space Case after all)_. He still hadn't made a move when Casey turned around, and narrowly avoided bumping into him, or more accurately screeched to a halt to avoid doing so, and spilled contents of her glass down her front. She muttered an expletive, and moved to a cupboard to find some paper towels. Derek followed.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to surprise you," apologised Derek. Casey raised an eyebrow, instantly suspecting he wanted something; Derek was never genuinely conciliatory. He knew she wasn't fooled, so he cut to the chase. "Have you thought about what the Mountie meant by incident?"

"Yes, but there's no way of knowing. He obviously didn't want us to find out," Casey shrugged, it had not occurred to her that there was any option but to accept the Mountie's words at face value. She knew she would be frantic with worry about her family later, but at that moment, she was altogether too distracted by Louise and Michael's display in the corner.

"Poor sucker," Derek noticed what, or rather who, had caught her eye. "He obviously has no idea what he's getting into."

"He knows exactly what he's getting into. That's Michael, my apparently ex-boyfriend," admitted Casey bitterly, "I'm pretty sure she told him about finding us, in what she considered to be a compromising position, this afternoon."

"Do you want to get out of here?" asked Derek quietly. Casey was surprised by his display of empathy, but with one look at her roommate and ex-boyfriend, she realised she had no desire to question it, and nodded a yes.

As they made their way out of the party, several of Derek's team-mates, assuming he had pulled, gave a cheer, and he tugged on her hand to hurry her along; it wasn't good for so many people to witness them leaving together, but there wasn't much they could do about it now, and hooking up was as good a cover as any. Out of the corner of her eye, Casey saw Louise and Michael cast annoyed glances in her direction, and she felt a flush of satisfaction, but it was only once she left the flat that she allowed herself a small smile.

As had been his intention, Derek spent the walk back to her room convincing Casey to do a computer search on their family. They sat at her laptop, and searched using different combinations of Boolean operatives; looking at Canadian news websites for an event, occurring within the past three months, containing the terms "Witness Protection Program" and "relocate". A small, local paper in Victoria carried a story about an attempted abduction from a elementary school. The family had disappeared immediately after the incident, and an unscrupulous reporter quoted anonymous speculation that the family had been part of the Witness Protection Program.

Casey couldn't be sure that it was their family, but she pored over the article several times, in the hope of finding something that confirmed it one way or the other. When she found nothing, she shut down the computer, and turned to Derek, who had been uncharacteristically quiet since reading the article. He was sat on her bed, his knees pulled up to his chin, rocking as silent sobs wracked his body, and she knew that only the thought of something happening to Marti could have inspired that reaction. She sat next to him on the bed, and tentatively put her arms around him. For the first time since they had met, he offered no resistance to her hug.

"She has to be alright… She has to be… She… She has to be alright… She has to be alright…" repeated Derek over and over, the mantra fading, and then returning with renewed ferocity at intervals. Eventually he quietened down, his shaking abated, and he shrugged off Casey's arms. She moved up to sit cross-legged on the bed facing him, close enough to stroke his back. "I just… I just miss them," he explained quietly, each syllable purposefully formed, his mouth was dry with the effort of dampening down on the emotion that had overwhelmed him just a moment before. His head flopped down, away from Casey; he had never been good at sharing, but he hadn't opened up to anyone in a year, and he suddenly felt vulnerable and exhausted.

"I know," Casey nodded, though he couldn't see her, her tone conveyed a weariness that struck a chord with him.

"You're the only one that does. I can't tell people, and even if I could, they wouldn't understand," revealed Derek, in a rare moment of openness brought on by his Marti-related breakdown.

"I've lost my family, my framework and my safety net. I've lost them, but I can't mourn them, because they're not dead... And it's impossible to make friends, and build new support, when you can't let people in on what matters most," Casey felt relief, as she found an outlet for the frustrations of the past year. She sensed that Derek felt the same, as he mirrored her position on the bed, and made himself comfortable.

"It's like living a half-life…" began Derek, and Casey purposefully refrained from mocking his use of such an abstract term, "I'm constantly scared that I'll get a phone call from the Mounties saying that something's happened. But there's no fixed point to work past, nothing's for sure, and I just have to get by in the meantime," he admitted.

"Everything's in limbo," proffered Casey, and Derek nodded.

Casey felt a kinship with Derek, unlike anything she had felt before, certainly nothing she had felt in the past year, or anything she had ever shared with Derek. A hush fell over them, and she was suddenly aware that they had maintained eye contact for even longer than usual.

Derek recognised the moment too. Casey seemed capable of providing him with solace and escape, and after the terror that had consumed him at the idea of Marti being targeted, he sorely needed both. He studied her face, trying to figure out what this new found empathy entailed, and when she tilted her head minutely, he slowly leaned in to kiss her.

"What are you doing?" asked Casey, as though it wasn't painfully obvious, he was so close she could feel his breath on her lips.

"I just wanted to lose my self in something. Haven't you needed to do that recently?" asked Derek, part question, part disbelief that she needed to ask. Beneath his furrowed brow, his eyes remained locked onto hers, and she saw an infallible version of herself mirrored back towards her: a persona she had worked so hard to project, and that now seemed to be worthless. His reasoning sounded more persuasive than she had been comfortable to admit, but now, albeit begrudgingly, she realised he had a point. The appeal of finding comfort in Derek was suddenly overwhelming, and she found his gaze pulling her towards him. Moments before her lips touched his, she paused.

"Does it work?" breathed Casey. His puzzled expression revealed that his train of thought had not followed hers, in fact it had stopped altogether. "Losing yourself in people…" explained Casey "…does it work?"

"Nothing lasts till morning, but sex works better than anything else I've tried," said Derek truthfully. Though he would never have admitted it, he had struggled with the prospect of indefinite separation from his family, and this had manifested itself as a reckless enthusiasm for the more extreme pursuits that university had on offer. Campus life had provided an ideal testing ground for experimentation, as no one batted an eyelid at his tendencies towards excess. His conclusion, that intimacy was the most successful escape, had been rigorously tested against other methods, although even that yielded limited results, as his admission betrayed. He had inwardly winced upon realising just how jaded he sounded, he had always been cynical, but something had shifted, and he didn't have the heart to try and pinpoint what it was. He doubted that Casey would let it slide, but nonetheless he hoped they could gloss over it.

Evidently the past year had changed her, as she didn't ask him to elaborate; she had decided she would rather not know the finer points of what he was referring to, mainly because she had realised he was right; not that it was right, but that it followed a strong emotional logic that she'd tried to ignore. What had the world come to, what had she come to, when he was the one thing, the one person, that made sense? She ran through the reasons in her head that this tryst with Derek was a terrible idea, but this life, this room, this night, seemed to exist in a separate universe, and the logic she had previously built her world around was distant enough that she could silence it. Besides, she reasoned, had they not already crossed a line, any consequences would come to pass regardless of what happened next. Indeed, if they went all the way, maybe it would make any fallout worthwhile.

Derek recognised that Casey had reached a decision, and was about to pull away, but before he could move, she grabbed his collar and stopped him. Time seemed to slow down, every detail was clearer, every breath staggered, the intensity their gaze forced their eyes shut, and when they finally kissed, time apparently stopped altogether. Then, all bets were off. They grabbed at one another, desperate to be sated by something that neither of them had admitted to wanting, until minutes before. Derek vaguely realised why he had been so hesitant to hug Casey; the spark that the simple touch had caused was volatile, combustible, and he was conscious of no option but to let it consume them.

Afterward, they lay entangled amongst the bed sheets, her head resting on his chest, and his arms holding the sheets around her. Derek had always pegged Casey as a girl who would demand pillow talk after the deed, but he was pleasantly surprised that she was quiet. He had almost fallen asleep when he felt an exhale of air against his chest, knowing Casey as he did, he knew it to be a suppressed laugh, and he could not help but ask what the joke was.

"What?"

"You don't want to know," breathed Casey, confirming his suspicions.

"Tell me," demanded Derek, sleep having completely deserted him.

"Why are you ok holding me now?" asked Casey, peering up at him.

"You were right: I didn't want to know. What are you trying to do? Spook me?" teased Derek, hoping to put an end to the conversation there and then.

"No… Really… Why?"

Derek was easier to convince in his post-coital haze. "I dunno… Kiss overrides hug, I suppose… Less intimate maybe," offered Derek. Apparently he was also less articulate than normal in this state, and Casey squinted at him. "There's a goal, it's not just affection for the sake of it," he elaborated. Casey accepted this answer as she mulled over it for a moment.

"Did you snuggle with Louise?"

"You really are a Space Case, if you think I'm going to answer that," laughed Derek. Casey, aware from his tone that his answer was final, drifted off to sleep.

**Acknowledgement: Thanks again to Moonlit-Jeannie for the beta.**

**Authors Note: The story has focussed more on Casey's perspective so far, but that is deliberate, as she has had the biggest journey so far. If anything, it will be even more pronounced in the next chapter, before shifting in another direction. P.S. I have a really unconventional idea of romance, which I hope suits Derek, though it does mean there will be no sailing off into the sunset just yet. In fact, there are stormy waters ahead, but I'm counting on the dose of Dasey to tide people over.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don****'****t own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

Chapter 7

Casey awoke with a groan; her head was pounding and her mouth felt furry. She peeled her head off the pillow to open her eyes, but immediately closed them again, not ready to face the glaring sunlight. The effort of holding up her body was exhausting, she felt tender all over, and her head involuntary flopped back down, her face buried in the pillow. Derek's scent hit her, and memories of the night before flooded her mind. Eyes still shut, she moved her hand to blindly feel his side of the bed, but found it cold. She knew instantly that he had gone. She hadn't expected him to stay. Reminded of his words the night before, she couldn't deny that she had found a fleeting comfort, but it had already faded, and the memory left her feeling more alone than ever.

* * *

The trial began early in the new year, images of the Ontario Superior Court of Justice regularly appeared on the nightly news, and neither Derek nor Casey managed to remain unaware of the fact. Derek did his best to avoid looking at all forms of media, taping games so he could fast forward the news bulletins, and adding so many phrases to his browser content filter that very few pages were accessible. He played hockey more violently, threw shot glasses back at an alarming rate, and turfed girls out of his room before their heads hit the pillow, just so he could bury his head underneath it.

Casey took the opposite approach, becoming so militant in following the trial that she stopped socializing altogether. With the aim of preventing herself from giving into temptation, and going down to the Osgoode Hall, she buried herself in schoolwork, and even resorted to purposefully getting locked in the valuable books store, when the lure of the courthouse seemed too strong. She managed to work herself into such frenzy, that she became increasingly absent-minded with regard to eating and sleeping. She also failed to notice that she had skipped two months of her cycle, in fact it was eventually Louise that alerted her to the fact, when she bemoaned having to buy her own tampons as opposed to being able to steal Casey's. The prospect of pregnancy shook Casey out of her trial-related fervour, and she slumped into a stricken state of panic, which lasted over a week. She skipped classes, handing her work in by e-mail, and wasn't present at cheerleading to be reminded that the University of Alberta ice hockey team was due to visit again.

* * *

Derek was quick to notice Casey's absence when he arrived in Toronto. He had not been sure how to approach her, or if he even would, but when she failed to show, he realized just how much he had been banking on discussing the new developments with her. He decided to find and quiz Louise as to Casey's whereabouts, though Louise honed in on him first.

"Hi, Danny. Have you missed me?" Derek struggled to refrain from rolling his eyes at Louise's obnoxious greeting.

"Sure. I haven't seen your roommate about, is she OK?" Derek's response was far from subtle, but he hoped it would have the added bonus stopping Louise from continuing to pester him.

"No," spat Louise, obviously offended at Derek's interest in Casey. Derek furrowed his brow, and she was forced to elaborate, "I don't know what's up with her. I think she's finally flipped. She hasn't left our room in, like, a month. I've been worried," Louise's insincerity was tangible, but Derek had lost interest as soon as he learnt of Casey's uncharacteristic behaviour, which he attributed to the trial beginning. He zoned out as he considered his options, and Louise soon gave up on her unresponsive companion.

* * *

In a newly developed ritual, Casey was sat slumped against the wall at the foot of her bed, staring at her chest of drawers, wherein lay a pregnancy test, which she was trying to work up the courage to use. She had bought it a few days previously, and had made little progress, getting as far as opening the drawer before shutting it again. She was brought out of her daze by three sharp knocks at the door, but as she was not expecting anyone, she said nothing.

"Ca- Caitlin! Caitlin, are you there?" yelled Derek.

Casey started at the realization it was Derek, and shrunk back into the corner. The shock had pulled her out of mental daze, but she was still rendered mute, the prospect of confronting Derek had left her paralysed.

Derek tried to ignore the concern he felt when there was no response. From what Louise had said, he had been certain that he would find Casey in her room. It occurred to him that he had not yet tried the door handle, he had never been shy about barging in on Casey before, so he tried to do just that, but the door was locked. He decided he would wait for her to return, and paced back and forward outside her door, becoming increasingly edgy, until he couldn't stand to wait any longer. He tore a corner from a sheet pinned to the wall, and scribbled a message on it, before sliding it under the door, and then left.

Casey stayed rooted to the spot until early the next morning, staring at the piece of paper until its white edges blurred and morphed. When she heard Louise's key turn in the door, she was spurred into action, and grabbed the note, reading it hastily. It took her a moment to process the meaning of the four words, but when she did, their bitter sweetness brought her close to tears.

"I get it. D."

The thought of crying in front of Louise was the push she needed, and she discreetly took the test from the drawer, before escaping to the communal bathroom. Once there, she locked the door, and took the test. Sat hunched on the toilet seat, she zoned out as she rubbed Derek's note between her fingers, and started when the alarm, set for 3 minutes, went off. A nauseous feeling rose in her stomach, and she briefly grabbed the edge of sink, before she took a deep breath, and summoned up the courage to look at the strip. It was negative.

Casey collapsed to the floor. It had occurred to her that the stress of past few months, combined with the fact that she hadn't exactly been looking after herself, could have delayed her period, but she hadn't expected to be so lucky. She had spent so long preparing for the worst case scenario, and it didn't come to pass, yet it slowly dawned on her that she didn't feel so lucky. She waited for the stress of the burden to lift from her shoulders, and the subsequent elation, but instead she felt hollow. Gradually she was filled with sense of disappointment that things weren't going to change, which gave way to a echoing longing for something that had never been.

As she sat slumped amongst the pipe work, Casey felt as though she was plumbing new depths of loneliness. And the person who kept flashing through her mind was Derek; he was the person she yearned for, as much as she fought against it. Though many of reasons that had previously dictated the course of their relationship were now obsolete, she realised they had been superseded by another: she had mixed feelings for a boy who, she was quite sure, would never take her seriously. Her relationship with him had taken on a new significance, and she believed he would not be able to hold up his end of the bargain, if asked, so she resolved to do everything in her power to keep him in the dark. Derek was the one person who could possibly understand, but she could not imagine ever risking her heart to tell him; she just didn't have the strength left.

**Acknowledgement: Thanks to Moonlit-Jeannie for the beta and the advice**

**Author's note: I wasn****'****t tempted to go down the pregnancy route, because even in a **_**different universe**_**, they were clued up enough to think to use protection, and besides, it would have been overkill on the angst. However, considering the circumstances, and the way Casey gets herself worked up, I reckon a stress-induced scare would be quite realistic… it also means that Casey is now stuck in a bit of a dead end, so the next move will probably have to be Derek****'****s, which doesn****'****t bode very well, does it? **


	8. Chapter 8

**Author****'****s note: Just to confirm that Casey is definitely not pregnant. If you want to read into this chapter that either a. she****'****s hiding a small infant in her pom-poms or b. she****'****s not showing and**** still cheerleading, despite being 3 months overdue, then that****'****s your prerogative, but it****'****s not the way I see it - I reckon she has enough on her plate.**

**Disclaimer: I don****'****t own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

Chapter 8

As the summer stretched on forever, Derek tried, without success, to shake his uneasiness over Casey, and he was anxious to return to Toronto. He didn't manage to avoid learning of the gruesome facts that came to light in the trial. It became brutally clear how dangerous the people involved were, and why the authorities had been forced to go to such extreme lengths to ensure the safety of their family. Derek's anger towards his father, for involving them in the situation, was replaced by a new found admiration for him; for the first time, he recognised George's courage in going forward, and respected his stalwart determination to shield his family from the violent realities of the situation. Not that it made living with his current reality any easier.

* * *

The following November, the Alberta Golden Bears returned to Toronto. Derek hurried to the Arena, ahead of his team-mates, and was disappointed when Casey wasn't amongst the cheerleaders practicing routines. He sat in the stand, hoping she would turn up, but eventually his coach harried him into the changing room. When he came out onto the ice, he was massively relieved to see Casey along side the other cheerleaders, and skated over to the side, as close as he get to her without drawing attention to himself. Casey's mind was obviously elsewhere, and it was only when Louise saw him, and waved flirtatiously, that Casey was alerted to his presence. She started, and a look of alarm spread over features, before she hurried away.

"Did she knock you back, Valenti?" teased one of his team-mates, and Derek shook his head, but said nothing, as he skated back onto the ice. The game began, but Derek was thoroughly preoccupied, as he tried repeatedly to catch Casey's eye, without success, and became increasingly frustrated. His coach recognised that Derek was distracted and began shouting obscenities, but he remained completely oblivious, and when he body-checked a member of his own team, he was substituted. He looked over to the cheerleaders, and caught a glimpse of Casey disappearing into the women's locker-room. He shrugged off his coach's angry tirade, and followed her.

After panic had gripped Casey, at the thought of talking to Derek, her sole plan of action had been to avoid him. It fell at the first hurdle.

"What the hell, Case? I thought I would be the one going out of my way to avoid this conversation, but you've been taking it to new lengths. What's your problem?" challenged Derek, launching into tirade as soon as he found her, before she had even had a chance to turn around. He advanced on her, and when she faced him, suddenly illuminated by the harsh strip lights, he only just managed to contain a gasp. She had always been slim, but she had lost weight since he had last seen her, and her skin had a pallor that made her beauty was all the more striking now that it seemed so fragile. Her collarbone protruded painfully, her arms hung limply by her sides, and her previously full breasts… Derek's inappropriate train of thought was interrupted by Casey crossing her arms, and she managed a small shrug.

"Are you still upset that I was gone before you woke up?" Derek wracked his brains for what he had done, to have Casey acting like she was; she had never been afraid of him, but she almost cowered as he backed her into a wall.

"I guess," it really wasn't what was upsetting Casey, but if he thought it was then it was easier to confirm it, considering the alternative was to tell him the truth.

"I didn't want to wake you, and I couldn't miss the bus… I left you a note when I was up in February. What did you want me to do?" asked Derek, frustrated by her lack of response.

"Nothing," Casey's resistance was being worn down, she realised that from his point of view he had done the honourable thing, more or less. It was a rare occasion that she wished he had caused the problem with one of his pranks, but it was definitely the case this time, "I'm sorry - it's not your fault," Casey felt a pang of guilt at her words, he had the upper hand, even if he didn't know it, "You still throw me off my game, you know that?"

"I thrive on that," admitted Derek, with a smirk.

Suddenly Casey was back in familiar territory, their relationship might have been unconventional, but it was theirs, and despite being no closer to admitting it, she felt a rush of affection for him that she had no way of verbalising. She moved to hug him. Derek, uncomfortable at the sudden shift in gear, squeezed her ass, which produced the desired affect of her pulling back, as she recognised his tactic of sexualising affection.

"How could you think that was an appropriate moment to bring sex into our relationship?" Casey's indignation was clear from her tone.

"Haven't we established, by now, that sex is _always_ a part of our relationship?" Derek's hand gestures emphasised his point, as he made no effort to hide his amusement.

"I'm not one of your little flings," protested Casey.

"No. You're far more work," conceded Derek, causing Casey to recoil, "Come on, Case! What did you think would happen? You couldn't possibly have expected us to have a relationship?" When she didn't reply, he continued, "We don't even like each other, and we are, to all intents and purposes, family, in the real world. Besides, we live hundreds of miles apart, and for our own safety, we're not supposed to have any contact, never mind date!" Derek had lost control of his rant at some point, and before he knew what he was doing, he twisted the knife a little deeper, "Would you really trust me to be faithful in those circumstances?"

"I can't believe I ever… You know what, Derek? Screw you! I don't ever want to see you again," cried Casey, as she fled from the locker room.

Derek's feet remained rooted to the floor, as he processed what had just happened. Had he jumped the gun, or was a relationship what she was hinting at? What had possessed him to say what he had said, and why had he had such a brutally robust argument at the ready? The thought of them being together genuinely hadn't occurred to him, the reasons he had reeled off had acted as a successful deterrent, and they held true, but he still regretted having gone as far as he had. He felt a churning feeling in his gut that rarely beset him, but as he identified what made it vaguely familiar, he realised that Casey had evoked it in him before. Frustration gripped him as his fist hit the tiled wall. He needed a drink. He needed several.

**Acknowledgement: Thanks again to Moonlit-Jeannie for the beta**

**Thank you for all of your reviews, there's a loyal handful who always make the effort (Leaf26, Jayley, Phoebe P and Lanter), and I just wanted to acknowledge that by giving you a shout out, because you****'****re ace; and feedback makes me irrationally happy.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I don****'****t own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

Chapter 9

The next morning, a throbbing pressure in Derek's hand woke him from a dreamless sleep, and he squinted to examine the cause of the pain, obviously his penchant for hitting walls had been thoroughly indulged the night before, judging from the state of his fist. At least he hoped it had been walls, and not people. That hope was quickly extinguished when hauled himself out of bed, and felt his ankle collapse below him. He dragged himself to the mirror, to examine the extent of the damage, and found that his battle scars were even worse than he had initially feared. He retreated back to his bed, and attempted to find a position that didn't hurt. He was still trying, without success, by the time Jake, the team-mate that he was sharing the room with, returned.

"Hey Dan… what the hell happened to you?" asked Jake, as he caught sight of a pummelled Derek.

"I was hoping you could tell me. I don't remember a thing," admitted Derek.

"Not likely. You disappeared after you were benched, and no one saw you again. You look as though you took on the entire Varsity Blues squad."

"I feel like it too. I think I've broken my ankle," groaned Derek.

"I'd be surprised if that's all you've broken. Coach is going to freak when he sees you."

* * *

Jake's assessment, though less than comforting, turned out to be entirely accurate, and when Derek returned to Edmonton, his ankle and wrist were set in plaster cast for almost a month. The doctors prescribed some strong pain medication, which induced severe bouts of nausea when combined with alcohol, and Derek was confined to his room over the holiday period.

It was a lonely way to spend Christmas. He was still doing his best to avoid finding out about the trial, so he largely avoided watching television. The letters that had stopped altogether when the family had been relocated had never restarted, and Derek found himself poring over old letters from his family. Several from Marti referred to interestingly named new friends, though he wasn't sure if Marti was trying her hand at aliases, or if more imaginary friends had been invented to keep her company. There were a few awkward letters from his mum, evidently terrified after a police briefing, Abby tried to avoid saying anything, and the only point that came across was that she missed him. Derek missed her too.

At the bottom of the pile was a letter from Casey, that she had sent in their first semester. He immediately regretted reading it, as it brought her back to the forefront of his mind, and with nothing to do but stare at the ceiling, thoughts of her entered his mind unbidden. Visions of her dancer's form, her certainty of gaze, and her unique pronunciation of his name haunted him. He rationalised that this was because he missed his family, and she was the only one that he was physically able to contact. Eventually, after picking up the phone dozens of times, and repeatedly backing out, he gave into temptation. The phone rang several times, and Derek was about to hang up, when Louise answered.

"Hi, it's Daniel here, from the University of Alberta," explained Derek, "I'm trying to get hold of Caitlin."

"Oh yeah, you hooked up with her, didn't you? Her boyfriend was mad," Louise's selective memory would have been laughable at any other time.

"Is she there or not?" asked Derek, his mood was not conducive to playing Louise's games.

"No. She just disappeared off the face of the earth one day. I came home and all of her stuff was gone. I've not seen her since. What do you want with her any…"

Derek hung up once he realised Louise had nothing else to add. A blind panic gripped him, as he absorbed the turn of events, his heart was pounding so hard in his chest, that he could hear each thump reverberate in his ears. Without thinking twice, he picked up the phone again, and called the emergency contact number he had been given. The Mountie on the other end picked up instantly.

"What's happened to Casey? Where is she? Is she ok?" The jumble of questions in Derek's head spilled out in no particular order.

"Can you please provide your name, and security number," stated the Mountie calmly.

"I need to know if she's ok!" demanded Derek, not having the patience to follow protocol. When the Mountie refused to answer, Derek scrambled around for the piece of paper he had taped to the back of one of his credit cards, "Daniel Valenti. 071 006 260 054."

"The person in question is fine. That is all the information you are privilege to," stated the anonymous Mountie, his sharp tone brokered no room for negotiation.

"Thank god," breathed Derek.

"How did you become party to information that would lead you to concern for her welfare?"

"You know that I've seen her whenever my hockey team has been in Toronto," Derek avoided the question, and hoped the Mountie would be satisfied with his non-answer.

"You are currently incapacitated, and as such, should not have been in contact with Caitlin McConnell since November," stated the Mountie, sounding strangely computerised.

"Just forget it," Derek realised that he had no answer that would get the Mountie off his back.

"I shall endeavour to, once again, brief you on the protocol regarding your situation. At no time shall…" The Mountie launched into his spiel, and Derek tuned out, he could almost recite the whole talk word for word already, "…I remind you that safety of your family is at stake," finished the Mountie, and promptly hung up. Derek listened to the dial tone for a few seconds, before collapsing back onto his bed with a groan.

Though he hadn't been aware of it, Derek had counted on Casey to make his current circumstances seem bearable. He was in constant pain, there was chance he'd never play hockey again, he couldn't drink (which seemed to rule out socialising) so he was alone, for the first time in his life, and to make things worse, there was nothing to distract him from dwelling on all of those things. Having been unable to reach Casey, he had exhausted the one resort he had left, and he slumped into an angry depression for several months. He ate take-away food, neglected his injuries, and abused his medication, all of which caused his injuries to persist for longer than necessary, and contributed to his self-perpetuating misery.

His motivation for hockey was at an all time low, and the thought of painful physiotherapy made him return to his doctor for repeat prescriptions. On one such occasion, Derek was sat in the waiting room, watching the mute television, when the lunchtime news bulletin came on. He was unable to give into his instinct to switch it off, and yet, he couldn't tear his eyes away. The caption at the bottom of the screen read "Ontario Crime Syndicate Trial: Judge expected to begin sentencing today", Derek was tempted to yell at the receptionist to switch on the sound, but stopped himself at the last moment. Instead, he fled from the room, and back to his flat, where he switched on his computer, and brought up a news article on the trial. He skim read it, to confirm that it was the right trial, which it was, and, as he had figured, the verdict was guilty. His head fell back and a grunt escaped his throat, as a surge of relief coursed through him. The remainder of the afternoon, he spent refreshing the page, waiting for the article to be updated, and when it finally was, the news was good.

* * *

Derek was due his monthly call from the Mounties, and summoned up the energy to answer. He had ignored it one month, so they had come to see him in person, and it wasn't worth the hassle. Once the Mountie had dispensed with security questions, and as usual, skipped the pleasantries, he asked Derek if he had heard the outcome of the trial.

"Yep. They're all been found guilty and jailed for life," confirmed Derek.

"With regards to your situation, the repercussions of the verdict are positive. The threat is now significantly reduced, and whilst we advise that you retain your anonymity, we shall be downgrading your protection. This will allow you greater freedom of movement, and both your surveillance and monthly briefings will cease. You will still be able to contact us on this number, should you have cause for concern. Have you considered your options upon graduating?" asked the Mountie.

Derek had zoned out slightly, the Mounties all spoke like they had been programmed to regurgitate dictionaries, so he had not caught on to the implications of what had been said.

"What do you mean? Are the Mounties branching out into Career Advisory Services?" joked Derek.

"No," said the Mountie, his tone vaguely amused, apparently the verdict had lightened his mood, "I was referring as to whether you intend to be reconciled with your family group or..."

"That's an option?" interrupted Derek enthusiastically.

"Yes."

"Then, that's what I want to do," decided Derek, without any hesitation.

He felt reinvigorated at the thought of being reunited with his family; he had been desperate to get out of the hole he had been stuck in, and now he was desperate to go home. The success of the carrot and stick incentives applied right through to his schoolwork; he kept his head down, attended summer semester classes, and passed outstanding modules. The irony that he only started working at school, when he stopped wanting to be there, was lost on him, but he could almost hear Casey's smug satisfaction at 'what he could achieve when he just applied himself'. As was always the case when he thought of Casey, he was reminded there was a chance he'd never see her again, and a familiar pain shot through his chest, so he quickly banished her from his mind.

**Acknowledgement: Thanks again to Moonlit-Jeannie for the beta.**

**Authors note: Thanks for all of your reviews; I feel sorry for Casey and Derek too, even though it's me that's torturing them. I know it's unlike him to be depressed, but I think in these circumstances it's quite believable; his world has pretty much fallen apart, and whilst he managed to distract himself for a while, but I think it would catch up with him eventually. Besides, I think he gets a lot of validation from the people around him, so in this scenario I can imagine him wallowing in self-pity.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I don****'****t own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

**Author's note: This chapter is unbeta-d. **

Chapter 10

After Derek passed his final exams, he was so desperate to see his family again that he arranged to graduate in absentia. The Mounties had arranged his flight, ensuring it included a transfer, apparently that made it more difficult for people to track, not that the threat was as great now that the trial had finished. The stopover was only two hours long, but to Derek it felt like days, and when the last people to board the flight wandered on, he glared at them with a vehement loathing. When the plane finally touched down in Montreal, he jumped up from his seat, and practically sprinted to baggage reclaim. It had been four years since he'd seen his family, but the ten minutes spent waiting for his bag to come around on the carousel seemed like an eternity.

As he passed through the arrivals gate he scanned the area for them, and spotted them at the closest end of the barrier. Marti was jumping up and down with the anticipation of seeing him again. Marti. The shock winded him, as he realised how much she had grown - she no longer looked like his little Smarti. She caught sight of him first, and surged forward, past the designated area.

"Smerek!" cried Marti, as she sprinted towards him, throwing her arms around his neck, now that she was tall enough to do so. As he lifted her off the ground, and squeezed her tight, he felt other family members join the hug. The relief was overwhelming, and it was only when he finally opened his eyes, and spotted an old lady tearing up at the sight of their ecstatic reunion, that he remembered they were in a public place, and pulled back.

"Dad! Edwin! God, it's good to see you guys. And Marti! My Smarti! Am I still allowed to call you that?"

"Of course!" laughed Marti, rolling her eyes.

"You're so grown up!" Derek's voice broke slightly, as he realised he was stating the obvious.

"She is twelve after all," said Nora, in a sing-song voice that suggested this was a much repeated phrase. She stepped forward to hug Derek, having refrained from the previous throng, in order to give the Venturis some space.

"Hey, Nora. You look good," said Derek, though in truth he thought both his dad and Nora looked a little more frayed around the edges than when he had last seen them. "Where's Lizzie?" he asked as they began to make their way out of the airport, slowed by Marti suckering herself to Derek's side.

"She's gone to off to study at university," provided Edwin, his expression betrayed that he wasn't entirely happy about it, "She said to tell you that she was sorry to miss you."

"Have you got change for the ticket machine?" interrupted George, as he rooted around in his pocket.

"I left my bag at home," admitted Nora.

"Some things never change," Derek laughed, as details of his previous life came flooding back to him.

"It's quite comforting," agreed Marti, her calm reflection was testimony to how much the ordeal had shaped all of them.

"Not to mention quite expensive," griped Edwin, as he passed a handful of change to his father.

Confused by Edwin's apparent attitude, Derek passed a puzzled look to Marti who nodded, and leaned up to whisper in his ear, "He's been like that since Lizzie left," her concerned tone revealed even more than her words. Derek nodded, and made a mental note to spend a bit of one-on-one time with his brother later.

"Are you hungry, Derek?" asked Nora, and Derek gave her a look that made it clear the answer was obvious, "Stupid question," she admitted, mainly to herself, but Edwin nodded all the same, as they made their way over to the car.

"Are you happy to sit between Edwin and Marti in the back?" asked George, and Derek nodded. "We've not been able to put you on the licence yet, since we didn't know your new name," he explained, as they squeezing into the small hatchback.

"The car's only big enough for five, so Casey couldn't come, but she'll…" explained Nora, as she started the car.

"Casey?" At the mention of her name, Derek jolted out of his seat, and spun around to face his stepmother.

"Yep. She transferred to a distance learning course in her third year. Missed us all too much to stay away," explained Edwin, his implication being that Derek and Lizzie hadn't.

Derek slunk back in his seat, reeling from the news that Casey was home, and that he was about to see her. He hadn't allowed himself to consider the prospect, in case he had been setting himself up for disappointment, if she had been relocated elsewhere. The car started, and the family's chatter resumed full flow, so much so that they didn't notice Derek's lack of involvement in the conversation.

"…We had to be home-schooled after we moved again," Marti provided a blow by blow account of her daily life. Derek was tempted to ask about incident that had forced them to relocate, but he decided to wait until Marti wasn't there; he didn't want to risk upsetting her. "Dad and Nora were teaching us, but they don't remember much from school, because it was so long ago. Casey took over tutoring us when she got back; she's really good at it, far better than she used to be, though she's still a dud at maths, which is why it's so impressive Edwin got into McGill. He's commuting into university every day, studying Commerce, his professors say he has a real talent for entrepreneurship," gushed Marti, apparently some of her older-brother-adoration had been transferred to Edwin, in Derek's absence.

"Casey's really enjoying tutoring though, and she's signed up for distance learning, so she can go into teacher training when she's finished…" Nora took up where Marti had left off, updating Derek on their lives. He hoped that she would change the topic soon; the knot in his stomach, caused by the realisation that Casey was home, couldn't get much tighter.

* * *

Their new house was a terraced townhouse, in one of Montreal's outer suburbs. It was still light when they arrived, but Derek failed to notice much, such was the anticipation of seeing Casey again.

"She's been up since dawn getting the meal ready," revealed Marti, as they made their way inside.

"It's almost like she thinks of you as company," joked Edwin quietly, though it was a big occasion for them all, truth be told.

When Derek entered the front door, he was physically paralysed by the familiar scent that hit him; he could smell the meals that his dad had burnt, the potpourri that Nora was so fond of, and Casey's perfume. Casey. He was still processing that thought when she emerged from the room at the end of the hall.

"Hi, Derek," her voice barely louder than a whisper, but his eyes were fixed on hers, and he heard her as though she had shouted. He was rendered mute, unable to verbalize any of the greetings, questions, or jokes that flooded his head. "Welcome home," she continued tentatively, unnerved by his lack of response. He advanced on her, and pulled her into a hug, which she didn't return. He quickly pulled back, and was further disconcerted when he caught sight of the look in her eyes, she looked almost frightened. He had been so thrilled to see her that it hadn't occurred to him that she would still be upset; the fight seemed like lifetimes ago to him.

The rest of this family recognised this shift in mood, and when they sat down to eat, conversation was stilted and awkward. Both Casey and Derek were noticeably silent, and Casey avoided making eye contact with him at all costs. It was painfully obvious to everyone, but no one could bring themselves to remark on it; they assumed it was due to the changes in circumstances, and the pair maturing at university. As Casey had prepared the meal, she was able to excuse herself under the guise of serving the food, and she took every possible opportunity to flee to the kitchen. As she fetched desert, George raised the topic everyone was avoiding.

"This was always going to be a little strange for everyone; you and Casey haven't seen each other for four years," began George, and Derek stared at the tablecloth, so as to avoid looking anyone in the eye.

"You've both have matured at university. You fought like cat and dog before, so I'm sure you won't want to fall back into that pattern. It'll just be a matter establishing a different sibling dynamic, by developing new methods of communicating with each other," suggested Nora, and Derek almost choked on his water; apparently the upheaval of the Witness Protection Program had caused Nora to check out some self help books, and amateur psychology was not welcome addition to the Derek and Casey saga.

"She seems to be biting her tongue, so maybe she's not planning on 'developing new methods of communicating' with Derek, maybe she's just planning on not communicating with him at all," Edwin's input was as unreassuring as the past few hours had taught Derek to expect, and he fleetingly wondered if his brother would now qualify as emo.

"I thought she was just nervous," offered Marti. By twelve she had become more reserved, waiting until everyone else had contributed to the conversation before sharing her insight, but she was more intuitive as ever; her guess was the most accurate.

"Why don't we open a bottle of wine…" suggested George, hoping to remind everyone of the evening's earlier, festive tone "… to celebrate Derek's return."

"That's a nice idea. I'll…" Nora was about to get up, when Derek stopped her.

"I'll get it," he offered, already half way to the kitchen.

"But you don't know where we keep it…"

"I'll ask Case," yelled Derek, as he proceeded to neglect his task, and instead, confronted Casey in the kitchen.

"Are you still upset about our fight? Because I'm sorry, I was out of line; stuff was just getting to me," his apology was sincere, and she blinked, before averting her eyes at the strength of his gaze.

"It's ok," she reassured him quickly, before scurrying to the fridge. She had resorted to freezing him out, but was uncomfortable with him trying to make amends; he had not known the context of their fight, since she had chosen to keep him in the dark. She turned to face him, but kept her eyes fixed to the floor. "Look, I'm sorry. It's not your fault. It's really me who should be apologising..."

Casey hurriedly took the cake and cream back to the table, leaving a perplexed Derek stood in the middle of the kitchen. He considered Casey's behaviour as he collected up the glasses, which took longer than normal, because he hadn't yet familiarised himself with the cupboard layout. He couldn't fathom why she would be sorry; she had never apologised for her reaction to his behaviour before, so that wasn't the reason. He was tired and frustrated by a lack of answers, so he resolved to speak to her later, and poured himself a glass of wine, before returning to the dining room.

"Casey said that she had eaten too much whilst cooking, so she's gone to her room," explained Nora, in an apologetic tone.

Casey was definitely hiding something, decided Derek.

**Author's note: Thank you for all of your reviews, I hope I did this chapter justice, it was difficult to guess how everyone would have reacted to the reunion. I hope no one is too freaked out by emo Edwin; I figure that suddenly being the eldest sibling, in such difficult circumstances, would have had a major impact on him, and on his relationship with Lizzie, so her leaving could have been the final straw (he's also a teenage boy, and they defy explanation). Derek and Casey don't make it easy on themselves, but fear not, the next chapter is the last one, and I have a hunch they'll be on speaking terms by the end...**


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I don't own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

**Author's note: Sorry this is so late; I had it all planned out, and I thought this was going to be the last chapter, but I really struggled putting it into actual words, and it decided otherwise. The next will be the last though. This chapter is unbeta'd.**

Chapter 11

Derek's preoccupation with Casey's secret had quickly spiralled into an obsession. By the time he sat down to watch television, he would have been unable to name the sport, let alone the score. He was so consumed with questions that when Marti confronted him with another one he didn't even process it, at least not until she cuffed him over the back of the head.

"What was that for?" cried Derek, abruptly wrenched from his train of thought.

"For not answering my question the third time I asked it," replied Marti, rolling her eyes.

"What question?"

"Can you read me a book before bed? I've missed my Smerek. And you make the coolest sound effects," pleaded Marti.

"You know, you being manipulative was a lot cuter when it didn't involve violence," Derek's complaint was nullified by him jumping out of his chair as soon as he realised what Marti was asking for; he was secretly thrilled that she was still young enough for bedtime stories.

* * *

"I knew you would know what _Avada Kedavra _sounded like. You're so much better at reading out loud than Dad and Nora, and Casey never lets me read Harry Potter before bed: she thinks it makes me hyper, but it doesn't. If I wanted to, I could sleep now, but I don't want to, because the next book is even better, and I'm really glad you're back," Marti was forced to pause for breath, and she gave Derek a lazy hug.

"Me too, Smarti. And I'm glad _you__'__re_ glad to have me back, but you should maybe try to go to sleep now," Derek knew it was a school night, but his personal record meant he couldn't scold Marti with any real authority, that was Casey's job. Casey, who didn't seem so happy to have him home. Why did it always come back to her?

"Edwin's glad to have you back too," Marti had attributed the unintentional stress in Dereks tone to concern over Edwin, "You should really go down and talk to him." She sounded slightly grieved that she had to part with Derek, and it was unlikely that she would have made the sacrifice for anyone but Edwin.

"Thanks. I'll see you in the morning, yeah?"

"Yeah. Goodnight, Smerek," Marti's voice was suddenly tired and content.

"Goodnight, Smarti," replied Derek, as he switched off the light and closed the door. A smile creased his lips as he caught sight of the light switching back on and heard Marti padding across the floor to her bookcase.

* * *

"Do you want a beer?" Derek tried out the words in his mouth, finding it strange to offer alcohol to his younger brother.

"Sure," Edwin obviously found it less strange to take him up on his offer.

He handed him a bottle, and sat down on a chair. The noise and blue flicker of the television filled the room.

"Let's watch this - that actress is cute," he suggested eventually, tired of Edwin channel surfing.

"If by cute you mean completely generic, then yeah, I suppose so. It's such a cheesy show anyway," Edwin dismissed Derek's choice out of hand, and continued to flick through programs.

"I thought being permanently unimpressed was my job?" Derek joked half-heartedly; Marti's concern over Edwin seemed increasingly justified.

"Don't like it now the shoe's on the other foot, eh?" said Edwin scornfully.

"Sorry," the apology could have been for any one of a number of things.

"So what…" Edwin was caught off guard by Derek's lack of fight, and his tone took on a wistful edge, "…everyone's sorry. Doesn't change anything."

"Is this about Lizzie?" asked Derek, it wasn't a subject he wanted to broach, but Marti had been right about everything so far, maybe she was right about this too.

"You don't know what you're talking about," snapped Edwin, clearly angry at the implication.

"Ok," the words slipped lamely from Derek's mouth, he had no idea what else to say, emotional situations had never been his forte, and he felt completely out of his depth. Edwin took so long to continue that Derek was sure that he had killed the conversation completely.

"You have no idea. You just went to university like you'd planned, left us picking up the pieces, left me to comfort Marti in the middle of the night, to figure out how to support our family on minimum wage, and after bullying me for years, you left me as the eldest sibling. Lizzie was the only person who got it, and she left too. So don't pretend you understand, because you can't," Edwin's rant ran out of steam, and he focused on the screen with renewed vigour.

The room lapsed into an uneasy silence, and Derek considered whether they might've had more in common than Edwin realised; he had felt like the rug had been swept from under his feet when Casey had disappeared from his life. The conversation had steered his thoughts into dangerous territory, and he was worried of digging himself into an even deeper hole with brother. He caught sight of Casey inching down the stairs, peering over the banister to see if she could make out any forms in the dark sitting room. She was as good a get out clause as he could have hoped for.

"Casey," his enthusiastic exclamation abruptly broke the silence, and, startled, Casey fell down the stairs onto the landing.

"Are you ok?" Derek leapt from his chair to make sure Casey hadn't hurt herself in her fall.

"She falls over so much she should wear padding. And since when would you care if Casey's ok anyway?" asked Edwin, once it had been established that she was, in fact, fine.

Derek shrugged; it was a loaded question if ever there was one.

Casey pushed herself away from him, picked up her jacket from the hook by the stairs, and headed out into the garden, not managing to keep Derek from seeing the injured look on her face.

* * *

"What's up with you?"

"Nothing," murmured Casey, obviously deep in thought.

"I know you, Case, and I know that there's never nothing up," laughed Derek. Casey remembered how Derek became like a dog with a bone when he wanted something, and she wished that she had made a better attempt at disguising her feelings.

"Double negative," She settled for pointing out his grammatical errors instead.

"So? What's up?" demanded Derek, not to be put off.

"Can't you guess?"

"When will women figure out that men can't read their minds?" Derek asked, neglecting to mention that he still tried his hardest to get inside Casey's head.

"You're the only person who's ever been close to managing in the past few years," she mused under her breath.

"Careful, Case, you sound kind of sappy… are you sure you want to go there?" his joking tone thinly veiled the warning.

"I thought we already did," confessed Casey quietly, her eyes fixed on a point below the patio. Derek felt an urge to wrap his arms around her, but he couldn't quite bring himself to, mainly because he couldn't figure out what it would mean to hold Casey, so instead, he settled for saying nothing, "I mean…" Casey had found some dry paint on the wall, and she was scraping it off with her nail, it was a nervous habit, but the vague distraction was the only way she could broach what she needed to say. "…what happened in Toronto…"

"What happened in Toronto?" their eyes ripped from the paint as Edwin caught on to the slip, having decided to join them in the yard. "When was this?" Both Casey and Derek avoided making eye contact, and the conversation turned into an interrogation. "What is with you guys? Why are you so quiet? And why are you not fighting? What aren't you telling me?"

"I saw Derek when his team came to play at my university. We told the Mounties. It wasn't like we planned it," Casey spilled her admission quickly, which earned a glare from Derek. She felt as though she was utterly transparent.

"Why didn't you mention it before?" asked Edwin. The only response was a shrug from Derek, neither had an answer to the question, at least not one they were willing to share. "So when you were separated from your entire family for four years, you still managed to seek out the one member you can't stand?" quizzed an astonished Edwin.

"It was only a couple of times… no big deal," Derek understandably played down their interaction, but all the same, Casey felt a slight pang in her heart.

"How did you manage to not kill each other without outside intervention?" asked Edwin, his question betraying only a vague hint of sarcasm.

"We improvised," said Derek sharply, it was clear from his tone he wanted the conversation to be over.

The irony of the situation suddenly seemed painfully acute to Casey, and a bitter laugh gurgled from her throat, as she turned and ran up the stairs. Edwin turned to his brother for answers, but saw only the back of his head, as Derek raced after Casey, leaving a thoroughly confused Edwin in his wake.

* * *

Derek found Casey sat on the bed, her hair falling down over her face. He sat on the floor, so as to have a better vantage point.

"I missed you," admitted Derek eventually, breaking the silence, there was a slight inflection to his tone, as he forced out the words, and he sounded completely insincere. Casey raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "I really did. I even called your room trying to get hold of you… I nearly had a panic attack when Louise told me you had disappeared. I was so worried that I called the Mounties to make sure you were ok, and got an ear-bashing from them too," complained Derek.

"I'm sorry," apologised Casey, giving him a half-hearted smile. The room fell into an awkward silence once again, it seemed unnatural for the pair to be quiet, and it had Derek on edge. He didn't know the line of attack that would uncover whatever it was that Casey was hiding, so he asked the first question he thought of, although he assumed he already knew the answer.

"What did happen in Toronto? Why did you leave?"

"I was lonely and…" Casey bit her lip as she tried to contain the emotion that threatened to overwhelm her, "…I had a pregnancy scare," she murmured. She supposed it was someway towards being the truth; it was all that she needed him to know, and only the sequence of events was untrue. The room was quiet, and she wouldn't have been sure that he heard, if he hadn't swallowed audibly.

"Was it mine?" asked Derek eventually, his tone betraying no emotion.

"I wasn't pregnant… But yes, it would have been," admitted Casey, anxiously waiting for his response, and misinterpreting his silence, she rushed to implement some damage control, "What a mess would that have been, if we'd had to raise a child together," her voice caught somewhere between acceptance and regret.

"That must've been tough," Derek realised Casey thought he had choked, and he finally found his voice. He was relieved that it was too late to comfort her, but as much as he wanted to, he couldn't drop the fact that Casey could have been carrying his baby. He felt as though he had caught a glimpse of a very strange parallel universe.

"It wasn't your fault. I couldn't contact you when I thought I was, and I didn't want to when I knew I wasn't. The circumstances were…difficult."

"Yeah. It would have been funny breaking that news to our Mountie though!" joked Derek, taking advantage of the moment of humour to compose himself.

"I can imagine him trying to work out the protocol for that scenario. I don't think he really got us," laughed Casey, relieved that Derek wasn't angry.

"No. I think we're kinda hard for people to get their heads around," he admitted, running a hand through his hair.

"Even I don't know how to define us sometimes."

"I think I might want to try?" It came out as a question, an ambiguous question at that, and Casey genuinely had no idea what he meant. In all honesty, he hadn't realised what he meant until he said it, or near enough said it, but he knew he meant it.

"You think you might want to try and define _us_?" She settled for rephrasing the statement, and batted it right back at him.

"I can't forget what happened in Toronto," Derek choked the words out, as he forced himself to verbalise the point.

"A lot happened in Toronto," there was no flicker of awareness on Casey's face that suggested she knew what he was trying to get at; she was staggeringly unperceptive sometimes

"I know, there's only one thing that I'm interested in repeating though. And it's not the psycho roommate," Casey squinted at him, if he didn't know better he'd have thought she was skirting the point deliberately, but either way, he was going to have to spell it out, "I mean when we," the words still wouldn't come, so he settled for some rather crude finger spelling.

"You want a repeat of us sleeping together?" Casey's tone was incredulous.

"Not one. I want to repeat it regularly," he couldn't find the right words, his declaration was ineloquent, and would have benefited from a cliché or two, but his hopeful smile caused Casey's breath to catch in her throat nonetheless, "I really did miss you," he leaned up, and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

Casey was caught off guard by the sudden moment of tenderness, she had longed for this connection, and her heart thudded painfully in response. His eyes searched hers, and he leaned in towards her. Yet again, everything boiled down to the pair of them, and it terrified her.

So she pressed the self destruct button.

"But…"


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I don****'****t own Life with Derek, nor anything connected to it. **

**Author****'****s note: This chapter is unbeta****'****d. Sorry for the delay, for what it's worth I'd considered including the first two lines of this chapter in the last cliff-hanger, but I decided that would have been cruel(er), and probably even harder to write. Anyway, I think it redeems itself, so I hope you enjoy it...  
**

Chapter 12

"But? But what?" The moment snapped in two as Derek registered Casey's tone, and he practically growled the question, "But what, Casey?"

"There's someone else," she whispered reluctantly.

"There's someone else?" he repeated her statement as though hoping its meaning would somehow change, beneath the disbelief his eyes were pained. She nodded slowly, "What do you mean there's someone else? You got me to put myself out there just to knock me back? Is that what this is? A power trip?" Derek's shell was back up again, and he was suddenly furious.

"Please don't… It's not like that - it's complicated," pleaded Casey, desperate to implement some damage control.

"Of course it is!" he yelled, his voice rough with sarcasm and indignation.

"I didn't expect this - I didn't expect us to happen," she admitted, close to tears, "And I know it won't be all peaches and cream if we do, but it's just… he's so straightforward… and we're so… not… we'll screw it up, and it scares me," her train of thought was incoherent, and if she had been able to pull it together, she would have seen that her emotional state had Derek half terrified, as well as furious.

"Well, well done, Case, you've screwed it up, so you don't have to be scared anymore," he mimicked her tone, whilst his hand gestures reinforced the point, "I'm done," he threw his hands up in surrender, and fled from the room.

"Derek, please!" her cry died on her lips as the door slammed behind him.

Loud music suddenly blared from the neighbouring room, but Casey resisted the urge to go to him; she knew it was best to let him calm down first, otherwise anything she tried to do would run the risk of exacerbating the situation even further. Still, she was haunted by the split second memory of the hurt on his face, the chink in his armour revealed, before he'd managed to compose himself. She drifted on the edge of sleep, unable to find a comfortable space in her bed, and when the low sun flooded through the window, effectively putting a stop to any chance of rest, she gave up, and made her way downstairs.

* * *

Derek was watching Marti softly, as she sat cross legged in front of the fridge sampling finger scoops of food before returning the containers to the fridge. As he heard Casey join them his face hardened, but his gaze remained fixed on his little sister who was now examining Casey.

"What was up with you last night?" challenged Marti, her accusation vague enough to have Casey on the defensive.

"What do you mean?" Casey answered with another question, her eyes flashing with panic.

"Derek? Loud music? You not complaining?" Marti elaborated as though speaking to a small child.

"Oh, yeah, maybe I like that album," she replied defiantly, but a little too late, with her chin jutting out a little too far, both of which gave her away. Derek hid a smirk.

"Sure," said Marti sarcastically, clearly not buying it, "Just carry on being weird then, don't let me stop you."

"OK," Casey had obviously stopped listening, and Marti rolled her eyes, before returning her attention to foraging for food.

"I'm sorry about last night," Casey began trying to make amends to Derek in hushed tones, "I really didn't mean to... I wasn't expecting…" Marti's presence meant that she was forced to avoid speaking directly about the subject, something Derek was very grateful for.

"Yeah, well…" he realised that his intended nonchalance hadn't quite succeeded, and he trailed off. Casey had to restrain herself from reaching out to him. She had belatedly realised that, even more terrifying than the prospect of being with Derek, was the prospect of not being with him; her fear of their ending had been a self-fulfilling prophecy; she had messed it up before it even began. The continuing silence made what she had to do increasingly clear. As though the universe was aligning for her to do it, the phone began to ring from the direction of the fridge, which would have surprised Casey, except that Marti had taken to carrying the handset around with her, having lost the _mobile phone wars _several months previously.

"Casey, it's Ben on the phone," yelled Marti, unnecessarily.

"I need to get that," said Casey softly, throwing an apologetic glance in Derek's direction. He shrugged noncommittally, and kept his eyes down as she left the room. He moved toward the fridge, and crouched next to Marti, to look for something salty or fatty or sugary, or a combination of the three. He took out a Hawaiian pizza bagel before putting it in the microwave. He tried to focus on the revolving plate, but couldn't stop his eyes from wandering to the next room, where Casey was talking in muted tones, as she stared out of the window, jumping but not turning when the microwave beeped.

"Is he…?" He couldn't help the question, Marti was far too astute to not notice his distraction, not to mention too loyal to mention it to anyone else.

"He's an _actuary_…" explained Marti, over-enunciating the word as though trained how to say it, "it's not as bad as it sounds, but _sooo_ boring. And just so you _never_ have to ask…" she warned Derek, "…that means he minimises risk. Or something…" the aptness of this wasn't lost on Derek, and he spluttered on his mouthful of bagel, which was failing to distract him from the unappetising idea of losing Casey again; it would be worse this time since they'd both be aware of it happening. He wasn't scared that he had competition for her affections, but he knew Casey, knew that she was inclined to cling on to anyone that met her criteria, even if they didn't make her heart race, _because_ they didn't make her heart race. He took another bit of his bagel.

* * *

"Derek, I need to talk to you," Casey's tone was serious when she emerged from the sitting room, and Derek instantly assumed the worst.

"And I need not to talk to you," he replied, apparently absorbed in helping Marti to use ketchup and sauce to decorate food that no longer looked edible.

"Marti, give us a minute, please?" asked Casey, not bothering to pay any heed to Derek's comment.

"Marti doesn't have to leave," Derek disagreed stubbornly, he was now convinced of the outcome of the situation, and if there was nothing to be gained from the conversation he would've rather not had it at all.

"Ben and I broke up," Casey admitted expectantly.

"Marti, leave," ordered Derek, receiving a disparaging look from Marti in return, but she didn't argue, instead she pulled herself to her feet, and sloped out of the room.

"I'm sorry, Derek. I didn't mean for last night to turn out like it did, but you sort of sprung all of this on me," began Casey, studying his face.

"You've said that already," his tone was brusque, but she couldn't blame him, she knew how badly she'd behaved the night before, it was natural he'd be a little stung.

"Ben never even compared - I know it sounds terrible, but he was just a distraction, an excuse. You'd never given me any indication of the way you felt… and I knew how I felt, but… I was avoiding it… I couldn't face risking your rejection. It was weak of me, and it meant so much to me that you were willing to go there," she stumbled over the words, admitting that she had behaved less than honourably, because of Derek, to Derek, was not an easy task.

"Go on," said Derek, his face betrayed nothing that would have served to encourage her.

"This isn't easy, Derek, you're making me crawl over hot coals here. You were in my position last night - why can't you show a little sympathy now?" it was becoming apparent that he wouldn't be satisfied until she spelt it out, and she couldn't guarantee that that would change the outcome, so his resistance irritated her; he'd been making the same plea not 12 hours previously, so he might've shown more sensitivity toward how difficult it was.

"Hot coals, Casey? Do you have any idea what you put me through?" The anger and hurt in his voice was clear, and Casey immediately felt guilty for bring it up. Things weren't panning out the way she'd planned, but she couldn't seem to keep from sabotaging herself. It was all or nothing, and she couldn't face the alternative.

"And I've told you I'm sorry, but I don't see what else I could have done - I didn't want to go _there _when there was anyone else involved, we're confusing enough without complications. And I owe you more than that," an edge of anguish laced her tone, "I owe us more than that."

"So there's an _u_s now?" his strategy was blatantly clear, he wanted her to suffer, to understand how he'd suffered the previous night.

"There's always been an _us_, Derek, but I want more, and I thought you did too," she levelled with him, examining his face for clues.

"I did," his cool demeanour was intact, but his short sentences suggested that it wouldn't stay that way for long; things would be decided one way or the other.

"Please tell me I'm not too late, that I've not screwed this up," Casey had decided that she couldn't afford to be above begging, "I don't what else I can do? I'll do anything. Please, Derek," Her voice broke on his name and he broke with it; the weariness in her demeanour betrayed the four long years they had been alone. He paused for a long moment, studying her face, trying to decide how to play this.

"Anything?" he whispered, but it carried all the force of a demand.

"Anything," she vowed, the note of desperation still present in her tone.

"Now there's an offer I can't pass up," he finally relented, and a half smile tugged at his lips.

"Mm hm?" Casey's lips parted into a slightly manic grin, as she sensed the change in his mood.

"I do have some conditions though," he qualified confidently, his tone had turned business-like, as he tested what felt like solid ground.

"I wouldn't expect anything less," she returned with a smile; she knew that she'd won him around, giving him the upper hand had been a necessary sacrifice, and it was one he was likely to take full advantage of. She found it was a situation she was quite excited by.

"You have to tell what you want first. And how much you want it," he made his demands with relish.

"You're going to make me beg?" her tone was utterly scandalised, and he failed in his attempt not to smile.

"When you say it like that… absolutely!" he smirked, without an ounce of shame.

"You'd never miss a chance to make me jump through hoops."

"Now you're just putting ideas in my head," he joked, "Oh, and the more you drag this out, the more conditions I'll add," his threat caused Casey to squint at him, and he pulled out the first stipulation he could think of, "speaking of which, I have a room that needs decorating."

"I'll decorate it," Casey didn't need to think twice about that condition; she loved to decorate.

"And have it look like a pink disco ball - I don't think so! I was thinking more along the lines of alternative sleeping arrangements," his smirk was ludicrously suggestive.

"Der-ek! Mum and George would freak!" shrieked Casey, but her indignation was coloured with happiness, he had all but admitted that he wanted the same thing she did.

"We wouldn't have to tell them," his suggestion caused her to frown.

"If we're going to date, we're going to tell them," insisted Casey; it was non negotiable, they were adults now, and the finely balanced family dynamics had been turned upside down a long time ago. Besides, they'd lived with too many secrets for too long, she needed to be able to be honest with them.

"Is that what we're going to do? I thought we could just fool around," He was still playing for time, he had missed their exchanges too much not to, but this was Casey, after all, and he had always known she didn't do casual.

Casey tossed her hair and raised her palm, in a _talk to the hand _gesture.

"Really? Talk to the hand? I thought that died in the 90s," he teased her with much enthusiasm, "You know, if you want me to take you seriously, you're going to have to stop with the hand gestures."

"Only when you stop torturing me," her eyes narrowed, but he could tell she was enjoying this return to form as much as he was.

"Where would the fun be in that?" he challenged her, knowing that she couldn't argue, well she could, but he would win.

"I think the fun would be the part that comes after," she bit her lip, realising just how provocative she sounded.

"And what part would that be?" he pushed for details, not convinced that she was being provocative enough.

Casey beckoned him towards her with her index finger, a predatory look on her face made his stomach summersault.

"Maybe there are some hand gestures we can allow," he backtracked quietly, as he became absorbed in watching her face intently. She slowly leaned into him, prolonging the moment, and her eyes drifted shut with anticipation.

"Casey," he whispered teasingly, his breath was hot on her lips, causing her eyes to shoot open. A smirk played on his lips, but his eyes were soft, "No buts?" It was playing dirty to bring it up now, but he was not going to be distracted from his mission, he had already done the legwork, it was her turn now, and he had no intention of giving her the satisfaction of admitting to it before she did. If she wanted him, she was going to meet him more than halfway. They wouldn't have been Derek and Casey without the power struggle, and that was what he wanted: Derek and Casey.

"No buts. I want you Derek. Just you," she surrendered quicker than he'd expected her to, after all those years, she just gave in, just admitted that he'd won the game, or maybe they both had. Truth be told, she just didn't care anymore, not when his lips were so close to her own.

The aphrodisiac of winning the ultimate power struggle, and of finally having Casey, overcame Derek and he crushed his lips to hers. She responded unthinkingly for a moment, before turning her head to the side and reprimanding him.

"Der-ek! You're not getting out of it that easily,"

"Or into it, apparently," he grumbled under his breath. He didn't know if Casey had heard him, but he was relieved that she seemed to have ignored him if she had.

"You need to tell me too…" said Casey tentatively, tilting her head to one side, her face was set as she held his gaze. She was going to extract an equivalent confession from him, even if it killed her, "What do you want?"

He knew now what he had wanted since they had met, and he was finally ready to go after it. The only problem was that it was Casey. The only girl who had never fit into his world order, and the only girl that he had craved when that world was ripped from him. He decided he was officially a sap, so why not admit it, and in the process, give Casey what she wanted too. After all, that had its distinct advantages.

"I want… I want to be with you," his confession earned him a beaming smile, as she pulled him to her.

"I want that too," Casey's murmur was lost in a kiss.

Derek's smirk faded into a soft smile as he returned her embrace. There, in each others arms, they had found a comfort that transcended the worlds they had been caught between, and a protection that they wouldn't have known they needed, had they not fallen through the cracks between those worlds. Why they had fought so hard against it, neither knew, but they had finally found home.

**Author****'****s note: I hope you****'****ve enjoyed reading about Derek and Casey being removed from everything they hold dear and broken down into shadows of their former selves. As it turns out, once you remove the obstacles of society, family, and their own personalities, they belong together - colour me stunned****…**

**Thank you for reading, and please review, I****'****d love to hear your opinions.**


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